Day 8: T-16

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Up, down, and up again. It is rollercoaster isnt it? Or maybe one of those rides where they take you up 100 feet only to drop you cold... And then raise you again.
Peter came last night with a very special gift: my mother's ring. I wanted to cry when I saw it, it was so beautiful (I realize... I'm crying a lot more these days...) It's a white gold band with a raised claddaugh in the center (for those who arent sure what a claddaugh is, it is an Irish symbol of a heart (love) topped with a crown (fidelity/loyalty) and with a hand on either side (friendship).) On one side, it is flanked by a peridot (Peter's birthstone), amythest (Nicholas), and citrine (Alexander); the other has an alexandrite (me) and amythest (Sophia). We will have two more added when these babies are born and we know their birthstones. I tried to take a picture with my cell and it is rather blurry, but perhaps I can get my MIL to take one with her digital and post that.
Even though my blurry image doesnt do it justice, it is really beautiful. It's a constant reminder of the family I love so much. And now, it is at my fingertips. Literally.
But, all good things have to be balanced with the not so good. While Sarah was visiting yesterday (sorry, no crafts to report...), I started having contractions. Not regular, but enough that I felt them. At 9pm, I was having the TOCO (contraction monitor), so I didnt think much of it. But when my nurse came in at 40m instead of an hour, I knew it wasnt good. Every 4 minutes. :( I'd drank my 3 pitchers of water over the day, but after talking to the doctor, she told me to drink 2 more. Which I did. In half an hour. And I turned from my back to my side. And they stopped. I was free of the TOCO around 10:30, peed, and went to bed. And peed at 10:45. And at 11:10. Finally, I fell asleep until, you guessed it, another potty break, although at 2:30. Then I was good until 6. But no contractions. So, while they were a bummer, it looked up. So, now I need to drink at least 4 pitchers a day.
But then things really looked up. I took my first shower today! Peter helped me to the chair and it was WONDERFUL. Dont get me wrong. Sponge baths are great. But there is something about the cascading warm water... a soapy cloth... washing your own hair... It was a great five minutes. But it got better. Dr B came in for his consult and told me that he thinks I misunderstood. I can shower EVERY day, as long as I feel comfortable. EVERY DAY. A shower. Being clean. Really clean. That lifts your spirits. It may sound like a small thing but to me, it is a huge victory. But it gets better. :) He said that he was looking over my chart last night and thinking, and he thinks that it would be okay for me to use a potty chair to urinate. (A potty chair is like a portable toilet thing that can sit next to the bed.) I didnt expect to get to this point until next week! He said that he wants me to use it today forward and that I will have a scan on Tuesday. He said that he is almost positive that this wont change my cervix at all or put pressure on the stitch, since it is so brief a time. It is also a good practice to see what kind of movement is going to be phazed back in (like eventually sitting for meals and using the actual toilet). So, right now it's just urinating in the portapotty and showering for 5 minutes each day. But it is a HUGE step for me. Just the brief moments of sitting up today (yep, I've already peed unassisted once! YAY!) have been such a boost to my self esteem. A feeling like we are really, truly doing better if he is allowing me these two, big priviledges.
I am on the TOCO now for my monitoring. (After last night, they said that I can definitely lay on my side, since that gives me less contractions than an hour on my back). And, dont worry, I am drinking! I actually think the potty priviledges might increase my drinking, since part of the issue, subconsciously, may have been the fear of "bothering" nurses. They are all so kind and NEVER once made me feel that way. I just know me and I cant help but wonder if that wasnt part of it. Even though I was drinking.
It's another good day thus far. Dr. B. leaves for vacation tomorrow. He made sure I have his number if there is an emergency (how wonderful of a doctor is that? to give you a personal number while he is on freaking vacation!) and said that Dr M will be covering and that hopefully she will "only say good morning every day because you wont need her!". He also told me that he is very optimistic that I will still be pregnant when he returns in 2w and that my scan on Tuesday will be a positive one. That really does help to hear.
So, today, I am feeling optimistic. Babies are moving (a lot) and contractions are few and far between (at least the contractions I can feel are!). My friend, M, is coming to visit today and I am looking forward to seeing her. And, I didnt even cry when Peter left for work this morning! So, emotionally especially, I am doing better. Physically, laying down is rough, but I think the weeks at home really prepared me and it isnt as hard as it would be if I came from being very active to being flat on my back. But more than that, the babies help. They are so good. They move so much and are just a bundle of energy. That improves my mood more than anything.
Since perinatal is doing my scans from now on, I dont know if I will have pics. :( Sad for you and for me. I didnt see a printer attached to the portable unit they use, so... Perhaps I will be able to have my cell take a good picture? I dont know yet. We will see.
So... 16 more days! These days are getting less and less. Before you know it, we will have another goal to count down too! Thank you for riding this rollercoaster with me and for the constant support. It helps so much, both in attitude and in the pregnancy. Those prayers are working and we are seeing the impact. Less days to goals. Small victories. Little priviledges. Lack of drugs. Thank you.
I'll keep you updated! Hopefully with only good news!

26 comments:

Shinejil said...

I'm so glad to read that things are looking a little brighter. Funny how the little improvements can make such a big difference! It's great.

I hope your little ones continue to do well, and that you get through the next 16 days with ease.

Donna said...

I can't wait to see a picture of your ring. It sounds wonderful.

HOORAY!!!!! For a shower and a few minutes of sitting. You are so right - that is a huge step! Next thing you know you'll be able to eat sitting up again.

Brooke said...

Wonderful news, Michele! I will continue praying for all of you. You continue to see the Blessing in every new privilege! I am so truly happy to see you and the babies doing so well!

Bluebird said...

I can't wait to see a better photo of your ring - it sounds incredible! What a sweet hubby you have :)

I can't imagine how those little privileges must boost your self esteem. Girl, you are headed in the right direction for sure! Before you know it, your dr will be back from vaca, you'll be sitting up for meals, and you'll just keep crusing right along :)

Which is not to say it doesn't suck. I know it does. And I'm so sorry for that. I'm just sayin ;)Yay for a good day.

cheryllookingforward said...

Sending you some prayers for the next 16 days. Keep that optimistic feeling!
Congrats on peeing by yourself!

Anonymous said...

I've been reading for a long time but never commented before. Just wanted to say I'm glad to hear you've had some good days and I'll keep praying for you!

-Sarah

Amanda said...

Hooray for daily showers and the potty chair! I've only been in the hospital for a few days but vividly remember how AMAZING it was to be able to get out of bed and take a shower. I'm so glad you and the babies are doing so well that you're allowed these little luxuries.

I cannot wait for the next countdown to begin! I have every faith that you will make it!

Sophie said...

Your ring sounds divine! What a beautiful idea. I will have to mention is to my hubby...

I'm glad you've been given the clear for these priveleges. It must make you feel more confident to know you can do that. I can only imagine how uncomfortable it would be to be stuck in bed for so long, and how scary too.

Thinking of you and your precious babes. xx

sarah said...

great news michelle!! we will have to coordinate our craft time so we can do them at the same time! take care sweetie!

all my love and prayers
sarah

Lachlan's Mum said...

I'm so glad for you that you can safely have these restrictions lifted. So happy for you that things are going better and that your babies are doing well. Counting down the days with you.

Mrs. Chop said...

So glad some restrictions are being lifted and I know that shower must have felt GREAT! You are so brave and strong and I'm thinking about you and keeping you in my prayers.

The ring is beautiful.

Anonymous said...

Michele, I always get contractions when I lay on my back. Sometimes it feels good to get off of my hips, but if I stay on my back for more than a few minutes, I start contracting.. Good hearing for you today :) I like your ring, your husband is a sweetie.
Anna in CA

Astrid said...

I'm so glad the Dr. left for his vacation on a good note. You are so strong, I'm so glad things are looking up. You deserve the world.

Beautiful Mess said...

*Here from LFCA*

Glad you're feeling better, emotionally today! A shower every day and a potty chair, that's great! You're doing such a great job! I know it's hard, but hang in there sweetie!
*HUGS*

twoweekwait said...

your bracelet with stones from the months of your babies is a beautiful idea. I'm going to do that too. . . I've been trying to figure out how to honor them. I considered getting a necklace with two hearts but it wasn't as personal as I'd like. This sounds perfect.

I am hoping and praying for you.

Barefoot said...

So glad to hear you had such a good day! I hope things continue to go smoothly.

Christine said...

I'm just now finding your blog I was researching cerclages and 17p injections since that is my course of action over the next few weeks. I have already been put on modified bedrest due to a shortening cervix (2.9) I'm 14 weeks 6 days. My peri is one who likes to save the cerclage for emergency purposes only but it's something I want to inform myself about. I will start the injections next week when I hit6 the 16 week mark. I will continue to follow your journey and keep you and you family in my prayers. Thank you so much for sharing your journey, it's always nice to know you're not alone and your blog has done that for me today.

Queenie. . . said...

I was so happy to see your updates from the last few days. I hope it continues in the right direction for many, many, many weeks to come. You're in my thoughts!

Michelle said...

I am happy to hear that things are going well. Taking a shower every day definitely sounds like a self esteem boost and going potty in the chair...YAY. I hope things keep going upward. You are in my thoughts!!!

Anne said...

This is such a postive post. It is wonderful to hear all this.

Catherine W said...

Your rings sounds beautiful, I love all the different stones.

Yay for the shower and yay for the potty chair. That is brilliant news.

Even more brilliant is that the first count down has only sixteen more days. Thinking of you and praying for you and your sweet babies.

As one of the previous commenters said, you deserve the world. xx

Carrie said...

Good news all around! My doc always says contractions are not bad as long as they respond to what they do... like hydration, drugs, rest. I am so glad you get to shower and use the potty! This is really exciting and I bet it will help you feel more human.

Grow, babies, grow! We are so close now... your calendar (and another little something) should be there by Monday or Tuesday. Big hugs!
Carrie

dreamyouremine said...

I'm so glad it was a good day! Yea for lots of baby movement, showers and potty breaks. Hang in there.

Annalien said...

I am so very thankful that things are looking up a bit. Thank you for keeping us updated. (Truth be told, I get very worried when you go quiet, so would even appreciate one-liner updates if those are the only ones you feel capable of in a day.) I will continue praying. God bless!

Andie said...

Hurrah for privileges! That is great. Simple things are the greatest joy :)

SMK said...

Hooray for every little step forward. That is truly a great sign from God that things are looking up. Celebrate it with a big tall glass of milk! ;) You truly do give me a reason to believe that God is out there and blessing you. I have been praying for you and your babies every night. I look forward to hearing more good news. Take care.