It Was Only a Matter Of Time...

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Honestly, I am surprised my blog survived this long without "Anonymous" making his/her rounds. I always wondered when I'd get some venom; I just never assumed it would be on a picture of Maya. So, Anonymous, whomever you are, please know that I am not publishing your comment attached to a picture of my sweet daughter, but I will publish it here and address you openly. You are lucky that I think the First Amendment is pretty darn important, librarian that I am, because even though what you wrote disgusts me, I still think you have the right to verbalize your own opinions.

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "This Face...":

I think shes beautiful but its kinda sad that you dont accept your younger children as their own individuals but rather your older ones in them instead themselves. I also think its sad that you still would want to have your older children instead those you have now. Boby and Maya will grow up feeling your distance and will grow up feeling guilty for taking place of your older children and they will feel you dont want them, but rather have your first children instead and they will end up feeling your rejection. I wish you cherished them and love them instead

Posted by Anonymous to My Life After Loss at December 16, 2009 8:24 PM

First off, I think my daughter is beautiful too. As to accepting Bobby and Maya as their own individuals: I'm not sure what led you to that conclusion. I dont believe for one second that Nicholas, Sophia, or Alexander somehow came back to life in their younger siblings. Bobby and Maya are their own unique souls with their own special destinies. However, just as I am sure my mother looks at me and sees a bit of herself because, after all, she raised me and I am her daughter, I would be lying if I said that I didnt see parts of their older siblings in them. Sophia's eyes... Nicholas's head shape... Alexander's dimples... They are siblings. It is only natural that they would favor one another.

As to wanting Nicholas, Sophia, or Alexander back at the expense of Bobby and Maya. Perhaps you dont read my blog and just stumbled across Maya's picture. I dont know. But I sure as hell know that, if you actually read it, you wouldn't have this misguided view. I have said on more than one occasion that I wouldnt, for all in the world, give up my children. ANY of them. In order for me to have had the privilege to mother them all, God had to call some of them Home. I dont like it. I will always have sorrow in my heart. But my heart is also filled with love and gladness. I cant imagine a life without every single one of my children and I accept that my lot in life is to hold some of them in my heart alone and some in my heart and arms. To imply- no, to actually come out and say- that I dont love and cherish Bobby and Maya with my entire being is to only show your ignorance of me and my family. Play your hate somewhere else, because it doesnt belong here.

After I read the comment by anonymous, I briefly thought of turning off the anonymous commenting feature, but I realize then that person, whomever they are, gets what they want. Too many of us change OUR way of expression because of this person (or these people) who troll infertility and loss blogs, spouting off nonsense. Not going to happen here. I value everyone's freedom to say what they want, especially my own. (Oh, and by the way, it's really brave to write shit under the name "Anonymous". And, Anon, if you didnt get the sarcasm, my voice is dripping with it...)

But enough about that pointless chatter... I do have real things to blog about.

***

One in three preemies ends up back in the hospital. We are no exception, although I'm really hoping that we arent the 2 out of 6. Maya was taken by ambulance to our local hospital late last night. She is fine now. Please dont worry. And thank you for the prayers that I know will be said on her behalf, in advance.

Last night, Peter had just fed her and she had taken way more (5.5 ounces) than normal. He went to burp her and she stopped breathing. We tried patting her back and applying pressure to her tummy to make her vomit, but nothing. She began to turn blue and her eyes widened. I called 911 and Peter used a bulb syringe to suction her nose and mouth. By the time the Police arrived (within a minute) and the EMTs soon after, she was on her changing table and breathing. The suctioning removed huge chunks of mucus (Maya has always had more secretions than Bobby and required more suctioning in the hospital) and then formula began coming out of her nose and mouth and she tried to cry. It was such a welcomed sound. The paramedic checked her out while I called our pediatrician.

I have never been happier to a) live in a small town where we are a stones throw from police/fire/ems; b) live in a small town where the local pediatrician still answers her own cell phone when you call after hours; and c) be within 15 minutes of a hospital (even if it isnt one I'd deliver in because even though they have no NICU, they do have CHOP pediatricians).

The paramedic said she looked fine and was breathing but to find out how our doctor wanted her handled. Dr W said that she would prefer that Maya be transported to the hospital and kept for observation, just to make sure she was okay and didnt have a repeat episode. As we were getting Maya into her bundleme and carseat, she vomited up the entire bottle she'd eaten and let out a huge cry. As she clung to me, I was so grateful that she was breathing well enough to sob. She even gave me a "mean Maya" glare as I undressed and redressed her. Her carseat was strapped to the gurney and I rode with her in the ambulance while Peter followed behind with Bobby. The EMTs stayed with us in the Emergency room triage room we were in until we started to be seen.

Chunky Monkey now weighs (with a onesie and diaper) 7lb 3oz. Her lungs were clear and she was hungry (big surprise after puking up everything she ate). I held her and then Peter laid down on the bed with her and held her. A sweet (and very young) orderly came in after he walked by and saw me laying my head on Peter's legs while sitting in a chair, and brought a large comfy rocking chair and two warm blankets. He was so kind. It was an unexpected gesture and one that really lifted me up.

We were in the ER area until 2:30 am when they moved us to a private room. Even though the rules say no children under 18 (thank you Swine Flu) and only one parent overnight in Pediatrics, the doctor made the concession to let us all stay together and Maya's nurse, herself a twin mom, offered cosleeping as an option. I was ready to hold Bobby all night, but when she offered to let him sleep with Maya after inquiring as to whether the cosleep at home, my heart just about leapt out of my chest. Once they were together, they slept so soundly, nuzzled together.

Maya was on monitors from when she arrived around 10pm until we were discharged around 1pm today. Her O2 numbers were always in the high 90s-100 (they wanted them 93+ when sleeping, 95+ when awake), she had a good respiratory rate and heartrate. She ate 2oz at her first 2 feedings in the hospital and almost 3oz at her final one later in the morning. Peter just fed her 2 more oz.

The initial doctor wanted to keep her for at least 2 days, observation last night and then do a numogram today. Basically, they would put something similar to an OG tube in, to find out if Maya was suffering from reflux. Her best guess was that this was reflux situation; Peter and I both thought that it was a combination of her eating a lot, having a lot of mucus build up, and then perhaps getting secretions lodged in her airway and being unable to move it on her own. This is from our experiences with Maya and her history of no reflux. So, we asked that, come this morning, they consult with the neonatologists and come to a recommendation with their advice. So, the doctor this morning called the head of Lankanau's neonatology and after some time (there was an emergency delivery so he was a tad busy), they touched base. He filled her in on Maya's history and said that, in his opinion, what was done was enough. That, had he been treating her, he would have kept her for observation but felt that more testing, at this point, wasnt needed. His feeling was that, if it happens again, yes definitely, but that she has no history to lead us to think this was reflux related and SINCE it happened during a feed AND SINCE she ate a lot more than normal AND WITH the mucus removed... he thinks she is fine. So, we are to not feed her more each feed, to burp her even more often than we normally do, and to suction her daily since the air is dryer, etc with the heat. We also will follow up with Dr W early next week.

They had their Prevnar immunization on the 15th, but we dont think that played into her issue on the night of the 16th. It was post 24 hours from the shot and, while after shots they do tend to be more clingy and want to eat less food more often (which happened yesterday), they had no redness at the injection site, no rash, and, if she were to have an allergic reaction that caused an issue with her windpipe, all signs point to it happening prior to 9pm last night, when all this went down.

***

I have to be honest here. I am a mess. I have had several moments where I have just broken down into sobs. One was when my MIL came to the hospital this morning. She walked in and as soon as she asked "how are you", the lie of "okay" couldnt come out and I just sobbed. Another was getting home. I walked into the living room, where the choking happened, and as soon as I saw the couch, the empty bottle, the drink glasses Peter and I had last night and the room in disarray, I just saw her face. Her beautiful face, swollen and turning blue, those little lips open and purple, her eyes wide and bulging. Even though the moment lasted seconds- perhaps a minute at the longest- before she was breathing again, it played out in lifetime slowness and I choked on my sob. Peter just held me. All I could say, all I could think, was "my baby girl... we almost lost my sweet, baby girl... my Maya". I am frozen just remembering it right now. Even though I see her laying peacefully on her daddy's chest after another uneventful feeding and I can hear her sweet little snore, I feel my stomach tighten and my heart pulled at how close we came. I cant even think of the "what if" statements that want to float in my head. I just cant. It is too much. Too raw.

As I watched her sleep last night, watched the flickering red numbers of the monitor telling me that what I saw was true and that she was, indeed, alright, all I could think was "Lord, havent we been through enough???" I know that my Mamaw says that God never gives you more than you can handle, but really, I think God has set some high standards for me and I'm struggling to live up. I'm not this strong, Lord. I'm really not. I cant handle the possibility of losing Bobby or Maya. I used to think Peter dying would be the thing that crushed me beyond repair, but I know now that I could survive that, just as I have survived losing Nicholas, Sophia, Alexander, and our sweet little miscarried saints. I know that I told God, not so long ago, that I was so grateful for just these few precious months that I trusted I could return them to Him if that was their destiny and fate. But, God, I was wrong.

I was dead wrong.

I cant. I'm not that strong. I know now, for a fact, that I couldnt survive this. My heart couldnt continue beating. Holding Bobby right now, feeling his little hands holding me as though I am the only thing in the world, watching Maya hold Peter the same way... Please. I cant take another child returning Home before me. If someone needs to go, please let it be me. But let their work be here on earth for another, I dont know, 100 years or so? (And, I'd like Peter and I to be here for most of that, if possible...)

***

Maya is fine. I know that. If something were going to happen, it would have been last night. But I am still on edge.

And feeling like I should just go ahead and buy stock in our local EMS (who once again, did a kick ass job at treating our family like their own).

47 comments:

cheryllookingforward said...

I'm so happy that Maya is ok. And I'm grateful that Peter knew what to do in that situation. I;ll say some extra prayers for you!

Michelle said...

I'm so sorry. I'm glad it all worked out ok but it must have been Terrifying for you and Peter.
It's ok to not say "okay" when someone asks how you are. It's ok to be honest.

Rain Child said...

My prayers are with you, your family, and especially your precious Maya and Bobby. I am so thankful that she is okay. I hope it's the last time you have to see the inside of a hospital room for a while.

Rachell said...

Thanking God Maya is ok! AJ did the exact same thing 4 days after we brought him home from the NICU. It was his midnight feed and he was eating like a champ. I just happened to look down to see his lips turning blue. I took the bottle out of his mouth and held him up, he went limp. The nurse in me took over, I 'yelled' to wake my husband to call 911 and I started CPR. The EMTs were there literally 1 min 30 secs upon calling 911 and as they were walking down my hallway, AJ started crying.I handed him to the emt and nearly fainted. I've never been more scared in my life. We were transported to Chilren's in ST. Louis and were there for 9 days. 2 more of those episodes happened again while we were there, always during eating, and after a multitude of tests, they said he was an 'aggressive eater'. We would have to put the bottle in, let him take a couple of sucks, take the bottle out, let him swallow/breath, then give it back, repeating a couple of times until he got a good suck/swallow/breath rhythm going. We found out a few weeks later that he did have reflux. We had to thicken his bottles with cereal (i know a lot of mom's turn their nose up at that, but it was suggested by his GI dr. and it worked) plus he was put on prevacid. The good news is that he did out grow it! (He was born at 29 weeks and got to come home at 6w4d).

As for the 'anonymous' comment, I can't believe the gall of some people. All I know of you and your family is what I have read on your blog and I can say that you're seeing Sophia in the eyes of Maya is a beautiful display of your love for them both. From what I see of you here, I know that you are stronger than most women I know in real life. Don't even give people like that a moment of your time, they are not worth it.

Mommy (You can call me OM) said...

I was just about to write that you handled this and are handling this much better than I ever could. And, I still think that is true. But I think it's a good thing you expressed your fears about losing her. I know I find that saying that out loud sometimes help take away the power of those feelings.

I will be praying that all continues to go well for all of you.

Peace, my friend.

k said...

My heart was pounding reading this post. How heart wrenching to have to deal with that. I am so sorry but so glad and thankful she is okay now. She will be in my prayers. Your plea to God made my heart twist with sadness. You've been through more than anyone should ever have to. I pray He keeps your darling Maya and Bobby in your arms and your hearts and they grow up to become beautiful adults and you will see them with children of their own. Amen.

Catherine W said...

Oh Michele. I'm sobbing just reading this. I am so, so sorry. I'm so sorry that you ended up back in a hospital. Poor sweet Maya, I am glad beyond words that she is alright. I can't imagine how terrifying it must have been.

Anonymous definitely doesn't read your blog. You and Peter are such wonderful loving parents to all your children. Thinking of you and your family, especially sweet Maya. xo

Missing Kasey said...

My heart fell to the floor when you wrote that Maya had to go in the ambulance. I am SO glad that she is ok, I am sorry that you even had to experience that with her! Sending you much love. ((hugs))
Nicolle

JenJen said...

I have a preemie at home (a 31 weeker) that came home from the NICU last Tuesday. Your description of what happened with Maya is one of my biggest worries. My heart stopped as I read your story. I often wonder about Cooper's secretions...do you just manage the twin's secretions with a bulb syringe? I try to remove some but I never get any...

Oh, and don't worry about what anonymous had to say...what a jerk, really. The only people that say stuff like that are people that have never lost a baby. I lost a daughter last year at 23 weeks and have a preemie so many of your post are words that I empathize with...

Paula said...

I'm so glad Maya is okay.

I've gotten anonymous comments to my blog blasting me for adopting internationally; I stopped allowing anonymous comments because I couldn't stand the nastiness.

Reba said...

oh my god, i am so glad maya is ok!! that must have been absolutely the most terrifying moment.

i know that awful face of "hey, that hurt, why did you let them do that to me??" after they get a shot, isn't it the most awful thing!

and anonymous...obviously that person hasn't lost a child or they would understand the beauty and amazement of seeing older siblings who are no longer alive live on in their younger siblings. i'm sorry you had to be hurt by someone's thoughtless comment.

Kristie said...

I'm so glad Maya is home and doing OK now. I would be just as shaken as you. Our daughter was readmitted about 2 weeks after we left the NICU. The event that got her admitted wasn't so dramatic, but as it turned out she had both RSV and the flu. Either one cold have taken her from us, but both together, had everyone in a panic once we knew.

Here's to a healthy winter and no more excitement out of either of those babies!

Barbara said...

Hugs for you all. I am so glad you are all home safely.

I swear if are ever lucky enough to make a new baby I will search his or her face for a likeness to George and I will take so much comfort in finding him there. Don't listen to negatives.

I had a comment a while back on my blog from someone inviting me to join a dating site...

xxx

Seraphim said...

Oh honey, to have two things happen one after the other. So wrong. Big hugs and I am so relieved that precious Maya is ok.
And Anon? not worth your or my time xxxx

John said...

Oh my God, Michele ... what happened to Maya sounds so terrifying. I can't even guess how panicked you must have felt. I am so glad to hear that she is doing okay now. I pray that they both have 100+ healthy years on Earth. I am praying for little Maya and for strength for you and Peter after enduring such a scare.

As for the Anonymous comment -- clearly this person is an idiot. How can they not see from every entry in your blog how you treasure each one of your children as a precious individual that you love fiercely precisely because they're each they're own little being?? You are an incredible and strong mother and Maya and Bobby will be better people for having been raised by you. They will treasure the memories you have of their older siblings but will also know how deeply special each of them is to you.

I am so sorry for both of these things happening at once.

sonja said...

P.S. Not sure if my comment showed up as me or as my DH's profile (I just realized John's gmail account was signed in).

Sophie said...

Firstly (in order of your post) anonymous sounds like some dumb kid who hasn't taken the time to read your blog properly. I don't understand how they came to their conclusions any other way. It is clear that you love ALL of your babes, very much.

Oh my god about Maya. Poor little munchkin! And yeah, not surprised you are so upset. I don't think I would be strong enough to lose another either. Anything like your experience with Maya last night would have me freaking upset too.

I am hoping for that hundred years too. For your family and mine.

Much love and cuddles for your precious little Maya. Hugs for you and Peter. You didn't need this, this close to Christmas. Deep breaths and big sighs!

xx

Barefoot said...

I am so glad that things are OK, but so sorry that you had to be the one in three. I can't imagine how difficult these last couple of days must have been. Thinking of you all.

Jessica said...

oh my Michele. I can only imagine how you are feeling. You say you aren't strong, but Michele you have got to be the strongest woman I know. You are truly amazing and I got to believe that both Bobby and Maya will be ok. *hugs* You are in my thoughts and prayers.

addingtothepack said...

I am so glad that Maya is OK. My little sister choked when she was about 6 years old. It was over in a matter of minutes (thank you Heimlich maneuver), but she turned blue and it was terrifying for me since I was just a kid myself and unable to help her. I can only imagine the terror you went through with Maya. I hope you are all taking care and recovering today.

Gabby said...

i have been following you every day and praying for you and Bobby and Maya. i am so glad that you are all home together. i coudl not read fast enough this story, and It kills me that you had to read the anon comment while dealing with Maya choking. i am so so glad that you guys were able to get her breathing again so quickly. even though i'm sure it didn't feel quick at all at the time. so glad she is okay!

You are an amazing loving mommy!

A n T said...

So glad to hear that Mya is okay.

AKD said...

Oh, Michele, I am so sorry that it's been such a scary 24 hours for you. I'm so glad that Maya is okay. My heart just sank when I read your post, and then it floated again when I heard that everything is okay. I'm thinking of you and hoping you're all doing well.

djsmom@live.com said...

Praying for you and with you and praising God for you and with you!


Tuesday, my sister saw 24 week, 3D ultrasound pictures of the baby I am now carrying. She told us that the baby looks like David Joseph, who we delivered at only 21 weeks.

Siblings do have the tendancy to have similarities physically and in personalities, as well as differences. So many people are uneducated and let's face it, we wouldn't wish infertility or losing a child on anyone! They can't understand because they haven't experienced what we have.

Hugs, Michele!

Two Moms, Two Monkeys said...

Just found your blog and wanted to say that you are amazingly strong and your babies are so lucky to have you as their Mama. They are beautiful.

I hope little Maya is doing much better now. My little sister was a preemie (12 years ago) and came home on an apnea monitor. She had several "episodes" where she would stop breathing and turn blue. I was 17 at the time and it was very scary, I can't imagine what my mom was going through at the time. Luckily she grew out of it and is now my lil pre-teen!

I hope you are all doing better tonight.

Michelle said...

Hi Michele, that must have been quite a scare for you. Whoever is a mum would know that having your baby turn blue and being completely helpless is the scariest thing imaginable. The same happened to me when I was a baby (mum said) and I was full term, a bit late even, so it might just be random? I don't know. But thank goodness she's ok.

April said...

YAY that Maya is ok! And BOO to "Anonymous"
I wanted to let you know that tomorrow I am changing the URL of my blog. I will be changing it to ourbrokenhearts.blogspot.com
I'm changing it because certain paople read my blog that I don't think should be reading it, because of the content. Just thought you might still want to follow!

Baby Smiling In Back Seat said...

I'm so sorry about the big scare (and about the anonymous troll bugging you). Sooo glad that Maya is doing alright.

A suggestion for your daily suctioning: the NoseFrida is so much better than the bulb aspirators. It looks weird (you suck the snot with your mouth), but it works wonderfully, and no the snot doesn't actually go into your mouth. Plus you can see what you're getting, and you can clean and sterilize it properly unlike the bulb where I feel like it never gets clean inside. Both of my babies need to be cleared almost every day (even more when they both had infections last month). Use a couple of drops of saline first. The babies don't care for the NoseFrida, but they also don't like not breathing well, and this does the trick.

Wishing for some calm days for all of you.

Heather said...

Oh my I think my own heart stopped beating there for a minute, but I am so glad she is ok. Thank the Lord. I am praying for you and them. Oh Michele...I'm so sorry you had to experience that.

And the commenter - wow. I agree with you - if this person had been reading your blog they would know that none of his/her accusations were true. What a jerk. I guess I haven't been around long enough to realize Anon. stalked these blogs...does this person get some kind of sick pleasure out of this? In any event, it doesn't matter what this person says. You, your babies (all of them), and anyone who has taken the time to get to know you through this blog knows better. Way better.

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry you had to deal with a nasty comment, on such a sweet picture and innocent post. I pray that doesn't happen again.
Also, I'm very sorry that Maya had to go to the hospital the other night.
You are all in our family's prayers.
God bless and peace be with you,
Renee :)

Kandi Ann said...

Hi Michele & Peter, As with addingtothepack right above me, I wanted to say, not that you need to know this yet but she remembers so long ago the choking. And I too, last year, my neice choked right in front of me on a fruit snack. I was able to dislodge it with the hiemlich but to this day I still remember like it was a minute ago. I hope for you that you don't relive that horrible moment again. Or I guess that I could say, since I know you will, Just grab her and hug her till the feeling passes and beyond. My heart and Prayers are with you.

As for seeing your Angel Babies in your children now, Hand to Bible, I saw my Angel baby Christopher in a young man that wasn't even related to me. And I told him so. I also told him about a vision I had and while I was telling him, he was telling me he had the SAME vision (minus the baby) when he was a kid. Others were with us when this happened and one of our friends actually screamed STOP your freaking me out. lol. So I totally get it. Too bad Anon doesn't. Much Love to your whole family. xoxo, Kandi

gwinne said...

Oh, Michele. I am so glad that Maya's okay. What a scare!

Terri said...

Oh, honey. I'm crying reading this. my heart in my stomach. although I know if something bad had happened you'd have called me. That was so scary. Esp after everything you've been through. I'm so relieved that all is well. Kids will take you on a roller coaster, that's for sure.
Anon is just one of those dipwads that get off on trying to upset people. Kudos on handling it in a classy manner. Love you, girl.

Tash said...

Hon, I'm so sorry you're having to deal with ALL of this. Rain/Pour, rinse, repeat.

Maya, no more of that, m'kay?

Hang tough, all of you. Funny how we think the journey ends, but really another begins. And it's never the one we thought we'd take. Much love.

Kacy said...

I am so glad that Maya is okay. What a scare! And for your anonymous commentor, they obviously don't know anything about you! And good work on making that known.

www.infertilityinstability.blogspot.com

Amanda said...

Whoever left that anonymous comment hasn't been fully reading what you've put out there. I'm the worst for skimming through blogs and even I know that anonymous was way off and completely wrong. Of course you see your older children in your youngest ones; they ARE siblings after all. And you've never even implied that you would trade Bobby and Maya for Nicholas, Sophia, or Alexander. As a matter of fact I strongly remember a post you wrote about how you know that if God hadn't taken them to be with him then you wouldn't have Bobby and Maya...and this is clearly God's will.

It is obvious to anyone with eyes in their head and a heart in their chest that you love ALL of your children.

*******

I will definitely say prayers for all of you. I cannot even begin to imagine how horrifying your whole night was. I'm just glad that it ended with your beautiful little girl still able to give you her "mean Maya" look. (((hugs)))

Justina said...

I'm so glad that Maya is ok. It must have been terrifying. Just make sure you look after you too, okay? You've gone through so much the last few months.

It made me so angry just reading that comment from Anonymous. Anyone reading your blog would know that you love all your children whether they're in your heart or arms.

((Hugs)) to you!

B said...

Glad you are all ok. You are ok.

peace Michelle.

love B

Once A Mother said...

sending you so many prayers and good thoughts as you deal with, well, all of this. glad you are all okay, as for that comment, the judgement is so unfair. of course you love ALL your children, but having some with you does not negate the love for those who are gone, and vice versa. you are all a family. you love ALL your children. we all get that.

Rachel said...

Oh, Michele, bless your heart! You are an amazingly strong woman and I admire you so much; you give me hope. I'm so sorry you're having to deal with this.

Many prayers and love to ALL of you!

MARGARETE said...

So glad Maya is ok. Oh, when I saw the word ambulance I got a little nervous.
Forget Anonymous...This person needs to get a life.

Just Breathe said...

I am holding you in my prayers. What a terrible scare. I am so happy that Maya is fine, poor little baby. I couldn't believe what I was reading. Give her a big squeeze from me. God Bless

Barb said...

Holy CRAP! Good response, but you don't even need to respond to crap like that. That person is obviously not all that intelligent emotionally or intellectually.
xoxo

sara (Angel Anthonys mom..with Alyson on the way) said...

this is in reference to :

"Anonymous" ....

the comment that you left has NO place in a blog such as this.. it has NO place in LIFE! You have no idea what youre talking about obviously, and, I would question how you even came across this blog! Seeing as though, you seem to have no remorse in your words, no sympathy in your reply and most of all .. no honesty in your identity!

I suggest you re evaluate your motives and your character!
and... Michele... right on with your response!!! I know I see Anthony in my "Rainbow baby" Alyson all the time.. and there is NOTHING wrong with that. Like you said, they are siblings. Of course there will be some resemblance!! and just because there is, does not mean that our new babies arent their own individuals... they are! they have their own destinies and will be their own selves...

so again.. to "Anonymous" . I suggest you delete this blog from your history or your favorites.. from your memory .. because youre rude words do nothing but cause aggravation (and perhaps thats your motive behind these comments).... and I dont believe thats what Michele intended when she starting sharing her journey.

I only wish I could state my emotions and thoughts with as much elegance as she does .. Lord knows, reading her words helps me when Im down, as Im sure they have helped many others.

sara (Angel Anthonys mom..with Alyson on the way) said...

oh boy! Im so glad that Maya is ok!! I know thats happened to Aly a few times.. she chocks and tries to breathe with no success... so, I suction her nose and out comes everything she just ate!
its a scary sight and a scary sound! I know the first time it happened, I got her ready to perform CPR!! no joke!

glad you guys "kept your calm" and got her taken care of...

The Swann's said...

What a freight!!! I cannot even imagine the thoughts, the feelings, the emotions that came forth as those seconds happened. I am so very glad Peter was there with you though!

I'm even happier to read that she is doing well now and is home! What an angel you recieved of a nurse!!! Thank you God for that blessing!

one-hit_wonder said...

oh my, how scary! i can't imagine! so glad that she's ok.

and anon sounds like the jerkiest of jerks who can't even read blog posts correctly. it's extremely evident throughout your blog that you bleed love for all your children.